Monday, February 20, 2006

The Secret Origin Of Goth Girl Blog Day

Dave Hewitt must have LOADS of free time at work. I got a letter from him a couple of days ago...

Sam,I was trying to figure out who wrote the famous lines:"I took the best nap today.. so so great. And I ate a sandwich, but it wasnt that great, and it kinda made me sick…but it’s better than nothing"It looks like it's someone at myspace, and it's in Google several places. But I could not figure it out exactly. Someone named Mikus also posted it. Now it's your turn to look into it.

So, I get to play Barnaby Jones now. Great. Here'as what we got and we get to explain how G.G.B.D. got started.

Last year about this time, on Better Living Through Blogging, an annonymous person posted this in the comments...

Bloggers are ruining the internet. What are “bloggers”? They’re fat–usually gothic–losers who keep web logs instead of hanging out with friends because they wet the bed and don’t have any. A web log is a type of online diary where people who aren’t important can pretend to be by writing to an imaginary audience. Girls are notorious for keeping these. On a typical site, you’ll find a 17 year old girl with hundreds of webcam pictures of herself pasted everywhere, an Amazon wish list so they can exploit wankers that visit their site, and about 2 gigs worth of text documenting every time they took a shit, had an epiphany about taking a shit or ate something (all written in extremely stylish, yet IMPOSSIBLE TO READ micro-font).

Here is an actual quote from a web log I happened across in my referral logs today: “I took the best nap today.. so so great. And I ate a sandwich, but it wasnt that great, and it kinda made me sick… but it’s better than nothing.”

So the question is: does anybody in the universe care about Ms. X who had “the best nap today” or that she ate a mediocre sandwich? I don’t, which is why I promptly uninstalled my browser and punched some guy sitting next to me. The page goes on and on about how she’s bored, tired, depressed, lonely, hungry, frustrated, etc, etc, etc. I can’t remember the last time I wanted somebody’s fingers to break so badly.

I took offense to this being a blogger and the fact that the person who posted it decided to hide their identity. I hate when folks post something like that in the comments to get a rise out of others, then run away like a jerk. So, I shot back like this to defend my fellow blogger and others...

Dear Anonymous,

Of course I said more, but I took a stand for all bloggers at that point, but somehow I came up with G.G.B.D. there, out of solidarity with other writers. It was a goofy idea, but it was fun getting together with other folks that day and doing something fun. Hopefully, it'll just be a good laugh to see others pretending to have goofy, mopey posts on their sites like a goth girl and who'll have the mopiest. If "mopiest" is even a word.

As for where "annonymous" ogt his post from, that person it seems couldn't even be original and write it themselves. Another person, who came up with the stupid name of Blogwer wore the following on David's site, bad grammer and all included...

Hey you bunch of morons, have you never heard of Maddox? Someone stole his article on bloggers from 2003 and posted it here as “anonymous”. Check out the original: you are all idiots

I have never heard of Maddox until a few days ago just like he has never heard of me, but it does come from his site. As for the "actual quote" from his blog, I'm gonna say that it's fake, since he never linked back to it and created it himself. Looking at his site, he's about as much of a blogger as anyone else on the web. I won't shoot insults at the guy however, as a person's blog is how they feel at that moment, so best of luck to him. It just gets me how folks can be mean in a comment and not back themselves up afterwards by using a fake name. So, to those folks out there...Blow it out your butt.

Remember, G.G.B.D. is February 25th. Let's have some fun out there that day.

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