Tuesday, November 06, 2007

Hail To Da Chief

It's very early in the morning here in Savannah and I'm just barely there right now. I'm at the radio station filling in for someone who can't seem to do the job well. But enough of that, as we have more pressing matters today. As most of you may know, I am a member of The League of Savannah Bloggers, formed in 2005. Ivan G. Shreve, who you may know from his own blog Thrilling Days of Yesteryear (the "G" stands "goody-goody") is also a member, so it's really just the two of us. There used to be three members, but the third guy was shady. Anyhoo, I got this comment this morning after enjoying my first espresso at work...

Sam, I received a bill in today's mail totalling $16,973.52 for charges...and damages...incurred at some swanky Las Vegas hotel for what appears to be listed as "League Of Savannah Bloggers BootyFest 2007."

Needless to say, I found this a bit disturbing--only because you saddled me with the presidency the other day and a glancing-over of the League's treasury yielded a shirt button and three Canadian pennies.

I tried to call your cell phone number today but all I get is a voice saying the number is "unreachable." And while I don't want to say anything before all the facts are in, this naturaly has me a bit concerned. Should I be?

Okay, first let me say that while I enjoyed my two year reign as President/Strongman of the L.O.S.B, I felt as though Ivan deserved the spot as he has moved from his old site to a new, sunnier page here with Blogger. He even has a photo of his own bad self on the page. So, effective last Sunday, I relinquished my role as Leader/Visionary and gave it to Ivan, but only for a year. 'Cause like, I might want it back after that. However after these claims, I must answer them point by point.

I am not sure why I was charged $16,973.52. Everything was good until the rumpshakers showed up. I got them at a discount because I had a coupon for 30% off. But then, Cris Angel, The Mindfreak showed up and screwed it up for everyone. He got piss drunk, told evceryone he could make the televsion on the wall disapear and tossed it out of the 21st story window of the Bellagio. He started screaming "MINDFREAK!" and started running around the room like Daffy Duck whooping and jumping around. I don't even want to get into the orangutan, the chocolate pudding and Louie Anderson. It all reminded me of the Fatty Arbuckle debacle and it gives me shivers just writing about it.

As for the treasury, I never asked for dues from anyone. I have a hard enough time asking foir folks to drop something in the Pay Pay bucket. However, there was more there than Ivan thought. I had at least two kuggerands, sixteen steel pennies, an RC Cola bottle cap, and a button from the Abe Vigoda Fan Club that was gathered during my tenure. However, since my time as Spiritual Guide/Grand Poobah of the L.O.S.B. as now over and I have given all responsiblities to Ivan, I have washed my hands of the whole "Bootyfest 2007" debacle. Besides, the Mindfreak said he would make the bill disapear. I can't see why Ivan even has the bill.

All I'm saying is, if you get a bill from the guy who manages Outkast and it's for a "It's Ivan's Turn" party, pay that brotha upfront first or it is my ass. Good luck on your year.

I need another espresso...

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