Wednesday, November 07, 2007

I have become a coffee fiend...

I became a coffee drinker in 1991 at the age of twenty-five. I was working overnights at Oldies 98.3 in Savannah and had nothing else to drink at the time to keep me awake. Somehow, I fell fell in love with the stuff, even though coffee makers at work always seem to suck. Either the coffee pot is never cleaned properly, or the coffee stays on the warmer for way too long and the smell of old java goes though the air and smells like burnt beans, or the coffee just plain blows because you're forced to drink it the way some office monkey made it to where it's too weak or too strong. You want to make a large Black guy mad as a rhino with something in its eye? Mess up the coffee. Go ahead. I dare you.

Last month at the radio station, the new market manager decided that the plain, boring maker had to go and brought in a Keurig Coffee Maker for the office. It's similar to the one in the photo above, except the one we have is just a little bigger. It still does the same as the the above and that is it makes single-serving cups of coffee. The way it's done is it accepts cartridges of various coffee, tea, even hot chocolate called K-Cup Portion Packs then pours the amount of hot water needed to make it as strong or as weak as you want it. It's as close as the perfect cup as a person will ever get. Because of that, I have become a caffeine fiend.

Just let me say that this machine has now made it bearable for me to even walk into the job these days. I now plan out my Sunday mornings around the new coffee maker. I refuse to even make coffee at home or even of I go out to breakfast if I know that I will be around the Keurig that day. On Sunday, I had two 6 oz. cups of Green Mountain Dark Roast. It was like Heaven and all the angels smelled of fresh coffee. Because of that, I wound up with a concentrated coffee high that had me buzzed all day and most of the night. As I write this, I have had two cups of Sumatrian and one cup of cappuchino and that should keep me up and awake long enough for me to make through classes today. I wish I didn't have to leave, but I have to get my education. I just wish I could take the coffee maker with me so we could be friends forever. It has become the only thing left at my job that seems to understand me and my troubles. If I could, I'd take it out for its own cup of joe for all the hard work that it's done. But it would just complain because the other guy's coffee wouldn't match up to the Keurig's high standards. Then it would call out the manager of the restaurant and bitch the guy out for making warmed over brown water and a fight would break out because the manager called the Keurig a German punk and I'd have to protect the machine's honor. This would be good for no one.

I had some time to think that out. However, it's because I've had too much coffee at the moment. Until then, I am gonna ride this high like John Force on a blacktop today. I'll check in later tonight. I need more Black Heaven.

I wonder if we can get a Cinnibon machine here at work too?

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