Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Save a Fish, Eat A Cat!


Create Your Own Sea Kitten at peta.org!

For many years, the People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals have made it their mission to protect animals around the world from abuse, whether it be from cosmetic firms to circuses. Today however the group has now possibly sniffing too much catnip with its new promotion, "Save the Sea Kittens".

Really? "Sea Kittens"?

I know that PETA means well as they always do. Usually the way they promote their cause is by going completely over the top. One of their ways is by having super models or celebrities pose naked for ads that say "I'd rather go naked than wear fur". Okay, for the most part the ads are mostly filled with women. There are guys naked in a few ads, but it's Tommy Lee and other tattoo canvased dudes. There's nothing wrong with that if you like skanky guys like Tommy Lee, but there is a limit.

Still, a person could say that the women are being exploited in the photos. Pamela Anderson may support the group, but does America need to see her naked to say that she won't wear a fur coat? She could be naked to say that this year's Super Bowl will be awesome and no one would care because Pam Anderson is crazy hot and naked. Nine out of ten men would admit to that fact and the tenth guy could possibly have vision problems.

P.E.T.A. also does things like throwing red paint on folks who wear fur in public, hoping that will throw the pelt coat away and never wear it again. Usually the attacks are on upper class (read "rich") suburban Manhattan females. Have you ever wondered why they haven't gone down to Harlem or Brooklyn to toss paint on the rappers who wear fur? Hell, get that stuff on their kicks and soon there'll be a "Save P.E.T.A." campaign up really quick.

All those are nothing compared to the "Sea Kitten" campaign P.E.T.A. has begun. According to their website, "Whoever was in charge of creating a positive image for fish needs to go right back to working on the Britney Spears account and leave our scaly little friends alone. You've done enough damage, buddy. We've got it from here. And we're going to start by retiring the old name for good. When your name can also be used as a verb that means driving a hook through your head, it's time for a serious image makeover".

Guess what, P.E.T.A.? Some people still like their "sea kittens" with tartar sauce and lemon.

Do they expect folks to fall for something like this? The moment the word hit the streets about it, jokes about "land fish" were all over the place and that's a bit more gross than "sea kittens" once people realize what those are. Besides, aren't real cats snooty anyway? They live their own lives, they spit hair balls, they stick their butts in people's faces and unless declawed (which some say is unfair to cats) they will rip the living Hell out of your sofa, beds, curtains, arms, legs, etc. Stupid "land fish'.

Meanwhile, if you take a "sea kitten" out of the water to pet it's scaly coat, it will die in your arms in less than ten seconds. Where's the fun in that?

The whole thing just feels like P.E.T.A has way too much free time on its hands by coming up with a way to keep their name in public and to keep folks talking about them, kind of like David Blaine does a stunt live on prime time television and he's usually this close to losing a leg because he screwed up somehow between the 72 hours he stayed awake when he started it. Trying to sell tunas, salmon, flounders and trout as cutesty-wutesy widdle animals isn't going to help the fact that some folks like them grilled and others like them with chips and malt vinegar. Maybe P.E.T.A should work on saving dolphins as they're pretty smart creatures.

Then again, maybe they should save themselves and stick to the Bob Barker Rule: Don't forget to have your pets spayed and neutered.

By the way, did anyone notice that "Dinner" up there has on a leather jacket? Shame, shame, P.E.T.A..

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Sea kittens for lunch today--and yes, with tartar sauce.

I saw the new PETA campaign and was like WTF? Makes you wonder if they've been huffing the red paint they toss around...

HouseT said...

With regards to "land fish", I will say only this. If someone caught them, skinned them, seasoned them, and cooked them properly, I'd completely overlook the stigma after bite number two was in my mouth.

Of course, I've had that philosophy ever since I noticed a few Chinese food places served very odd shaped pieces of chicken. Bird, fish, cat... as long as it's friedm with rice on the side. Booyah, baby.